HOTD: Life is a Game
by RebukeX7
Summary: Two men give Takashi and Kohta the chance to prepare for the end of the world. Just what insanity can come from two teens living life as if it was a game? Video Game fic! Crack with plot! Takashi/harem, Kohta/Harem. One shot until further notice.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Oh I'm going to love this one. If I owned High school of the dead the manga would have been updated by now. –troll face-**

**Day what is it…6? Of Rebuke's one shots for the future LIAG series remember one more then I'll post a poll of which one should be the next series and after that I'll update REDLIAG**

**J14agent I finally did it so don't kill me.**

**Chapter 0: A Co-op mission like no other.**

**-White Room-**

"Damn it Rebuff look behind you!" Jorn growled out as he continued smashing buttons on his game controller. He looked to be in either his late teens or early twenties, if he had to guess, he'd put him around 19-20 years old. He has short, spiked black hair, and his eyes were hidden behind a pair of black shades, however the man took off the shades, folding them up and placing them in a pocket, revealing his left eye to be emerald green, while his right eye was silver. In attire, he was wearing all black, with black boots, jeans, shirt, even a black trench coat which had the zipper undone.

"Bitch, I'm SURROUNDED so unless you want to be captain save-a-hoe. I suggest you wait till I kill these ass holes." Rebuff growled out as she continued smashing buttons on her controller. She stood slightly over six feet tall and her body had all of the right curves. She had caramel colored skin and white hair. Her hair was a slightly long, messy pixie cut and two of her bangs framing her face had been braided and dyed black. Her eyes were grey and she was wearing white lipstick. She was wearing part of a black suit. That is to say, the pants are there, and so is the top half of the black shirt, though the bottom of that has been cut-off just above her navel and neatly hemmed in place. The suit jacket was replaced with an equally sophisticated vest, though it was always left unbuttoned, and her white tie was usually quite slack. The dress shoes were also traded in for a comfortable pair of combat boots.

"The fuck are you two doing?" Rebuke asked his second and third in command respectively as he entered the room. Rebuke was a man with white spikey hair and silver eyes and tanned skin. He was currently wearing a black suit that was in complete contrast to his hair.

"Playing Resident Evil." Jorn said bluntly as if he was not wasting time playing a video game to his boss. Luckily Rebuff being the lowest rank in the room didn't feel like pushing their luck and quickly made up a bullshit excuse.

"What Jorn means to say is we are…_training_ in the event that we ever have to save a zombie infested world." Rebuff explained smoothly. Jorn had to stop himself from gaping at the woman due to her amazing ability to lie on spot.

"Whatever, Pause the game." Rebuke said as he shook his head at their antics. Once they did the two stood and turned to their boss. Jorn crossed his arms and leaned on a walk while Rebuff held her hand to her hip.

"What's up boss, another mission?" Rebuff asked while raising an eyebrow. Rebuke nodded his head at her and tossed a file on a nearby table.

"Rebuff, you are in charge of things until it's over." Rebuff gaped as the second in command looked at his boss in confusion. "She's in charge, Jorn, because you are with me. We are going to monitor this world together." Rebuke explained before the black haired man could ask.

"Oh cool, I don't think that has been done before. Which world is it?" He asked as he and Rebuke began walking out of the room.

"We're going to the high school of the dead world. We are going to train someone there to help end the zombie apocalypse." Rebuke explained as they walked down the corridor.

"Ah so you want my help to train Takashi." Jorn nodded sagely.

"Actually I was thinking of Kohta Hirano." Hearing Jorn stop walking, Rebuke turned to see his lieutenant gaping at him.

"You must be joking."

"Personally I believe that if he had a stronger body…" Rebuke began as Jorn shook his head.

"Even then, Takashi has better leadership skills. I think you should take my advice on this one considering…" Jorn trailed off uncomfortably.

"…Considering what?" Rebuke asked as he narrowed his eyes.

"Listen Boss…" Rebuke frowned. Jorn only called him that when he was nervous. "Your fighting style consists of summoning and commanding your summon. Mine integrates more with artillery and hand to hand, which is what these kids will be using. I think I have a better idea of who should be trained."

"Ah, but Jorn you forget. What I lack here." Reborn pointed to his bicep. "I more than ten times make up here." Rebuke finished as he pointed at his head. Jorn still looked unsure. "How about a bet then? You train Takashi your way and I'll train Kohta my way. When we finish we can dump them in their world and let them settle it."

"Rebuke! You know what happened last time we bet! A planet literally disintegrated!" Jorn shouted out making Rebuke shrug.

"Sponge-bob had it coming." Rebuke said bluntly. "Anyway deal?" Jorn frowned as he stared at the hand.

"What are the stakes?"

"…Loser Gangnam styles across a mine field?" Rebuff offered making Jorn smirk.

"Deal!" Jorn agreed as the two walked away from each other. _"Funny I can't help but think that I'm forgetting something important…"_

**-Later: Outside of the high school-**

Takashi and his friends we're running through the crowd of zombies, hoping to reach the school bus when the unthinkable happened.

_*CRASH*_

Time froze and two figures seemingly blew out of thin hair. One with blinding white hair the other with two different colored eyes. Looking around Takashi saw that all of his friends and the zombies were frozen in place.

"The fuck is going on!" Turning around Takashi saw that his overweight companion could still move about freely. Kohta walked next to Takashi as the two men appeared in front of them.

"Listen, I'm not going to waste time explaining too much." Jorn began as he glared at the two. "Do you want to end this zombie outbreak even at the cost of your life?" Takashi, although still confused, nodded his head in determination.

"And are you willing to become a monster in order to protect those closest to you?" Rebuke questioned to them, but both teens couldn't help but feel as if the question was directed towards Kohta. Kohta nodded his head nervously. "We'll train you two individually for one year and bring you back here to this exact spot. You need to work together to end this hell as fast as possible. If you don't…"

"W-what?" Kohta stuttered out.

"All life WILL end." Jorn finished bluntly.

"How we trust you?" Takashi demanded.

"You do or die." Rebuke said bluntly as Jorn aimed a black .44 magnum revolver.

"Also, I have a gun…" Jorn deadpanned as he aimed at them. Both heard a click as the man glared at them. "And now the safety is off." Both boys paled as Rebuke rolled his eyes.

"_He completely stole that shit from Shepard. _**(1)**_" _Rebuke thought annoyed before grabbing the back of Kohta's collar. "Let's go we don't have all day." Rebuke said as they both faded away, Jorn and Takashi mimicked their actions.

**-Later Jorn's Boot Camp-**

At a camp in a random jungle, Takashi paled as he watched Jorn pace back and forth in front of him.

"ALRIGHT MAGGOT LISTEN UP!" Jorn shouted as he invaded the teen's personal space and glared right in to his eyes. "Jorn's about to teach you the pecking order!" He shouted at the teen. "It goes you, the dirt, the worms inside of the dirt, my shit, Rebuke, and then me!** (An: Say what!?) **Any questions!" Takashi stuttered slightly and raised his hand.

"Just O-one" Jorn quickly pulled out his magnum and twirled it in his hand before aiming at the boy's leg.

***CRACK***

"AH shit! Fuck! Why would you do that!?" Takashi shouted as he rolled on the ground.

"Walk it off you pathetic excuse for a shit stain!" Jorn then tossed a knife next to the boy's face. "I want to see you at the other end of this forest by night fall!" Takashi turned to the sky in pain and noticed that it was already sunset.

"It's almost sunset!"

"Then you better get moving!" Jorn shouted at the downed boy. "I don't hear you moving!"

"B-but my leg…"

"I **CAN'T** _HEAR_ YOOOU" Takashi began trying to crawl away frantically. Jorn sighed as he turned away. "T_his boy is going to be great! Rebuke doesn't stand a chance…but what am I forgetting?"_

**-Private X7 Laboratory-**

What the second in command forgot was that Rebuke was a mother fucking cheater. Kohta was strapped down to a table when Rebuke walked in with a silver case that had an umbrella symbol on it. Rebuke set the case down and grinned at the boy.

"W-what's in the case?" Kohta asked fearfully.

"I for sure thought a gamer like you would recognize something from the umbrella corporation…" Rebuke said in mock pity as he pulled out a syringe filled with an orange liquid.

"But that's just a game!" Rebuke shook his head at the boy as needle was placed on the boy's neck.

"One's fiction is another's reality and all that. Fun fact: you are a manga and anime character." Rebuke grinned before injecting the boy. "This is a variant of the zombie virus in your world. Try to overcome its influences…or I will kill you, bring you back, and do it again until you have it figured out."

"AHH**HH!"**

"Quit being such a bitch!"

**-One year later: Outside of the High School.-**

"We have to make it to the bus!" Rei said to Takashi as the group ran through the crowd. Suddenly both he and Kohta fell to the ground in pain. The girls watch in horror as they were suddenly swarmed by zombies. "Takashi no!"

***BAM***

The group watched the confusion as one of the zombies stumbled back with its arm blown off.

**Bronze Trophy Unlocked: My first Kill! (Be the first to kill a zombie)**

**+100 points to Takashi**

They watched in confusion as the rest of the zombies were blown back by what appeared to be a black blur.

**Bronze Trophy Unlocked: M-m-multi kill! (Kill more than one zombie at a time.)**

**+100 points to Kohta**

"You girls get to the bus we will clean things up here." Now that the girls could get a clear view at the two they openly gaped at what they saw.

Takashi's muscles had become more refined and he looked to be an inch or two taller. He was wearing a grey tank top with a green bullet proof vest. He had on a pair of gray-camo cargo pants with knee guards and a pair of gray sneakers. His hair was slightly longer and he had a messy pony-tail. Also he had a vertical scar on his right eye. In his hands was a Drake Shotgun and he had two magnums strapped to his legs along with a sliver hunting knife on the right leg. Suddenly the blur of black stopped next to him and they saw a thin blacked haired teen.

"You clean up well Takashi." The Teen said in monotone making Takashi bark out a laugh.

"Like you're one to talk Kohta!" Kohta was wearing a black tank top and black cargo pants along with a pair of black combat boots. He had on a long black trench coat and a pair of black gloves. Kohta also had on a pair of black shades and his hair was neater and pushed more back but still retained some of its former spikiness. He had two silver revolvers strapped to his hips.

"Hmph." Kohta began walking towards more zombies. Suddenly stopping he turned towards Takashi and smirked. "Think you can keep up?" Takashi grinned as his friend this appeared in a blur.

**-In the white room-**

Jorn gaped at a smirking Rebuke with his right eye twitching.

"You're a fucking cheater!" Jorn shouted while Rebuke looked at him innocently.

"Who me? I don't know what you mean, now excuse me while I go set up a minefield for you." Rebuke left and closed the door behind him. Jorn growled as he could hear Rebuff cackling down the hallway.

**PAUSE**

**1. Read 117jorn's Mass effect fic for the reference.**

**And there you only one more until polls I'm so anxious to see which of my plot bunnies will be my next story**.

**Read and Review.**

**~RebukeX7**


	2. Polls Guide lines

**Disclaimer: I do own the polls!**

**Okay everyone its time for the polls! The polls will close on Saturday. Time for the guidelines**

**You can select up to 3 fics**

**Each current fic receives a bonus vote for every 5 reviews (reviews must pertain to the story or they won't count)**

**During the next week I will post the second chapter to each story.**

**When the polls close Saturday that's it. Done. Finished.**

**NOW**

**LET  
**

**THE**

**GAMES**

BEGIN


	3. Of Bets and Bitches

**Disclaimer:** **If I owned HOTD the zombies would be much more powerful**

**~White Room~**

Rebuke was in his office doing paperwork while grinning about how much he owned his second in command, he stopped suddenly as alarms began going off and heard someone running to his door.

_*SLAM!*_

"Code R! Code R!" Jorn shouted as he turned to his boss, who suddenly jumped up in alarm.

"What happened!?" Rebuke questioned in concern as he pulled out a silver Desert Eagle. If they were dealing with a code R there was no telling what was about to happen. Last time a code R occurred, Rebuke woke up as a woman because a certain third seat wanted to know if he'd look like her.

"I was talking to Rebuff and told her about our bet-"

"Why would you _do _that?" Rebuke shouted making Jorn scratch his head sheepishly.

"She caught me when I was watching a certain video that was recorded from the _Mass effect _universe a few years back-"

"-The one with that blue chick and that human girl?" Rebuke interrupted with a faraway look in his eyes.

"Yeah."

"Nice. So it's understandable why you were distracted."

"Anyway I told her about the bet and she smile and _walked away."_ Rebuke's tan skin went as white as his hair.

"Mother of God."

"I know!" Jorn shouted hysterically.

"We _have _to stop that psycho bitch." Rebuke in complete seriousness as Jorn pulled out his magnum.

"Too late, boys." Rebuff said as she sauntered in to the office with a smirk. Rebuke glared at her while gritting his teeth.

"The fuck did you do!" Rebuff gave her boss a look of mock innocence.

"Nothing bad boss, I _promise."_ Rebuke stepped back in horror at the word promise while Jorn winced. That last time she promised Rebuke anything she put itching powder in his condom.

"You _monster_."

"You see boss, when _you_ force _me _to work; its hard tiring work that takes a shit load of luck, ingenuity, and skill; lots and lots of fucking _skill."_ Rebuff growled out. "So when I heard that you two decided to take the easy way out and buffed those boys up before the start of the game, It was my duty as the person who you put in charge to raise the difficulty a little bit when Jorn paused the game."

"The game was only supposed to be played on easy! You _know_ they don't stand a chance! They're just normal kids!" Jorn shouted.

"Well they have to deal with it now, I locked the controls so don't even try to change it back." Rebuff said while her boss face palmed.

"Why did you do this?"

"Because every time you shit heads stray from canon _I_ have to write new codes and trick the system into thinking its canon to prevent crashes, along with writing the code for my own missions, _AND_ I am _STILL_ fixing the errors Jorn caused back when he worked alone in the Mass Effect universe." Rebuff said as she glared at her superiors, every word made her even more pissed off.

"Listen-"

*Slam!*

"No you listen you white-haired bastard!"

Rebuke shut up.

"Rebuff-"

"You too you black haired son of a bitch!"

Jorn shut up.

"So I decided, to train my _own _student shortly after you two left. That way both of you would pay for it!"

"It can't be _that _bad." Jorn spoke up in worry. He counted on his knowledge of Resident Evil to give him the upper hand in the bet, considering Rebuke never played it. Rebuff, however, was the only person in existence that could completely outshine him in the game. If she was in it too then he lost his advantage and with Rebuke's resources… he was fucked.

"I have to plan my _bathroom breaks_…" Rebuff began with a whisper. It was then that the men noticed she was standing awkwardly. "This conversation alone has not only cost me my break but set me back three weeks. So if you want to stray from canon, _damn it _you're going to do it right!" With that Rebuff winced as she tried to walk out of the room. Jorn and Rebuke stared at each other wide eyed before Jorn pulled up the game screen.

"_L-legendary Mode?"_ Rebuke and Jorn stuttered simultaneously. They knew that if both boys died before the end, therefore nullifying the points earned, or if someone else won that the bet would become a tie. A tie resulted in them both having to suffer the terms of the bet. Jorn raised a shaking hand and pressed play.

**PLAY**

**~Outside High School~**

**Takashi: 500**

**Kohta: 550**

After defeating the remaining zombies the group decided to head towards the bus. The girls watched the two in stunned disbelief, before finally Saya spoke up.

"Since nobody seems like they are going to say anything…I'll be the one to do it." The pinkette began before clearing her throat. "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU TWO!" She shouted causing the boys to smirk.

"I have no idea what you mean." Kohta said with an obviously fake mask of innocence, causing the girl to twitch.

"Shut up! You're the worst one!" Saya bit out before pointing to an amused Takashi. "He looks like he just came from a war!" She began before rounding on Kohta. "And not only are you actually fit for once in your miserable little life but you have _super powers._ The Fuck!?"

"If we told you wouldn't believe us, now hurry we have to get to the bus-"

***BOOOM***

**BGM: ****Resident Evil Retribution Soundtrack - Flying Through the Air**

Takashi was cut off as he watched in horror as the bus exploded. Takashi and Kohta looked at each other before smirking and walking towards the explosion. As they walked no words were exchanged, they weren't needed. Sighing to him, Takashi pulled out his drake shot gun and pumped it.

"No rest for the wicked, eh Kohta?" Takashi grinned as they walked. Kohta chuckled as he pulled of his glasses, revealing a pair of red-slitted eyes and glared at the flames.

"Is there ever?"

"You girls stay back there…this will be over soon." Takashi called back as two appendages ripped from the bus causing the door to fly in the air.

*Thud!*

The girls watched stunned as the naked corpse of a female student landed in front of the two boys with four, what appeared to be giant spider legs ripping from its back. The woman roared and charged at them. Kohta blurred from his spot and met the monster half way. Both slammed it to each other, with Kohta holding two of the appendages and struggling for dominance. The two's collision caused shock waves on the ground as flames danced around them. Kohta Grimaced as one of the other legs shot out at him.

"Stay frosty!" Takashi ordered as he blew back the leg with his shot gun. Kohta grunted and tossed the monster away from him.

"**RAHHHH!"** The monster screeched as it flew at Takashi, who performed a quick barrel roll and shot at the leg again; blowing it apart. Takashi grimaced as another leg grew from the hole.

***BOOM*BOOM*BOOM***

Takashi looked to see Kohta trading blows with the monster while grunting every time he took a blow.

"_Oh my God!"_ Rei thought in alarm before having to suddenly catch a fainting Shizuka. Saya looked on with frightened tears as she tried to prevent herself from puking at the sight of the horrific monster.

_*Clack*_

Saeko dropped her sword as she continued to watch the super-human fight.

"_W-what the hell is this!? We can't survive against things of this level!"_ Shook took a step back in fear before feeling her body erupt in pain.

**-With Takashi-**

"_Shit! How are we supposed to stop this thing?"_ Takashi thought before gaping as he saw Kohta get speared by a claw and tossed over to him.

*Thud*

"A-any ideas yet?" Kohta groaned as he struggled to stand.

"I'm positive that the main body is the weak point, but every time either of us attack it those damn legs get in the way! And when we destroy the legs they grow back too fast!" Takashi said as he reloaded his shot gun.

"**RAHHHHH!"** The teens grimaced as the monster shot at them at blinding speeds

**BGM: END**

**BGM: ****Resident Evil Retribution Narcissistic Cannibal (Korn) Theme Song**

*SLASH*

**SAEKO HAS JOINED YOUR STRUGGLE!**

**Takashi: 500**

**Kohta: 550**

**Saeko: 0**

"**RAHHHHHH"** The monster screeched as two of its tentacles we're sliced off. Both boys shared a knowing grin as they stared at their newest member. Saeko stood in front of them, wearing a black leather motor cycle outfit that was zipped down far enough to show her cleavage. She had two standard Katanas gripped in her hands and their sheaths were crossed over her back. But what caught their attention was what appeared to be silver pendent with an orange light attached to her chest. Saeko growled and round housed kick the monster back a few feet.

"I'm here to help." Saeko said simply while Kohta flipped to his feet and stood next to her

"Much appreciated, now that you're here, I might be able to pull off my plan." Takashi said as he stepped in between them and glared at the monster.

"Plan?" Kohta asked as he cracked his neck.

"I'll distract it and lure near the flames." Takashi began causing them to widen their eyes in alarm. "Once I'm there Kohta, you will remove the arms. With your strength you might be able to pull it off." Takashi commanded making the augmented otaku nod his head. Takashi finally turned to Saeko. "Once the arms are gone, behead that bitch and toss its body in to the fire. Understood?" Saeko nodded her head with a smirk. "Alright lets end this. Move out!" Takashi shouted as he charged the monster while blasting his Drake. Saeko and Kohta just shook their heads in wonder at their leader's bravery.

"Oh my God, the human just ran in." Kohta said Saeko twirled her blades and glanced at the black haired boy.

"You think he realizes his plan only has a 33.33, repeating of course, percent chance of working?" The swordswoman questioned as Takashi continued to barrel roll out of the way of the legs.

"Better than we would have had if you didn't show up." Kohta said with a smirk before widening his eyes when Takashi barely dodged a strike and got the monster near the fire. "Shit! Stick to the plan!" Kohta said before blurring away.

"**RAHHH!" **The monster cocked its appendages back, when suddenly; Kohta appeared on its back.

"**You. Mean. Nothing to me!"** Kohta roared before disappearing at his top speed and hitting the monster from all directions ripping the appendages off as he did. "Now Saeko!"

"**It's over."** The woman stated as she fell from the sky and beheaded the mutated girl. Saeko wasted no time and kicked the body in to flames as the body flailed in agony.

**BGM: END**

**Boss: Defeated!**

**Bronze trophy unlocked: Who do you call?**

**+ 600 dollars**

**Takashi: 500 + 500**

**Kohta 550+ 500**

**Saeko: 0 + 500 (Bonus: + 600 for killing blow)**

**Scores:**

**Takashi: 1000**

**Kohta: 1050**

**Saeko: 1100**

Takashi was about to praise his team when suddenly an appendage shot from the dying monster's back, thinking quickly, Takashi tackled his team down.

"Down!"

**-Slo-Mo-**

Kohta widened his eyes as the appendage flew at a stunned Saya. Gritting his teeth Kohta got up and ran towards Saya as fast as he could.

"Saya!" Kohta roared as he lunged at the girl.

'"Ahhh!" Saya screamed as she closed her eyes.

*thud*

*Schtik*

Kohta grunted as he stood up and helped Saya to her feet.

"You okay-"Kohta was cut off as the pinkette hugged him and cried into his neck. He rubbed her back soothingly.

"T-thank you*sniff*" The girl continued to cry.

"There, there it's okay, I promise to get you out of this country alive." Kohta whispered as Takashi and Saeko ran up next to him.

"Good save, soldier!" Takashi grinned as he placed a hand on Kohta's shoulder. Saeko nodded before pointing in front of them.

"But not good for him." She deadpanned. Looking up, Kohta and Takashi saw Shidou speared through the chest. Kohta winced, but remembered something that Rebuke told him about the man.

"Looks like the rapist…." Kohta began as he placed his shades back on. "Just got _screwed_."

**~White Room~**

Jorn and Rebuked stared at the screen while twitching as they stared at the scores.

"_We're FUCKED!"_ The two thought simultaneously before hearing the flush of a toilet. They turned to see Rebuff cackling as she walked away.

**PAUSE**

**And there goes the HOTD follow up make sure to review and vote.**

**~RebukeX7**


	4. Results

**Time for the Results! (Note More votes may have come in after I wrote this but it doesn't matter THESE are the final results) **

**HP Vs. HG: 74**

**FAO: 66**

**Spidey: 57**

**HOTD: 52**

**Louise: 50**

**SSB: 27**

**Saints: 21**

**Now for the Bonus Points. Each Review is +1 point ( did this due to the sheer difference in size for each fandom)**

**HP VS HG: 74(+ 15)**

**FAO: 66(+ 38)**

**HOTD: 52(+ 24)**

**Spidey: 57 (+ 32)**

**Louise 50 (+ 19)**

**SSB: 27 (+ 8)**

**Saints: 21 (+8)**

**Now FOR every 5 favorites there will be 1 point**

**HP vs. HG: 89 (+ 4)**

**FAO: 104 (+7)**

**HOTD 26 (+4)**

**Spidey: 89 (+ 5)**

**Louise 69 (+ 3)**

**SSB: 35 (+ 1)**

**Saints: 29 (+1)**

**AND finally for every 3 follows you get one point**

**HP vs. HG: 93 (+10)**

**FAO: 111(+12)**

**HOTD: 30 (+7)**

**Spidey: 94 (+9)**

**Louise: 72 (+8)**

**SSB: 36 (+2)**

**Saints: 30 (+2)**

**END RESULTS**

**BGM: FAIRY TAIL MAIN THEME**

**FAO shows why the Fairy Tail guild is the best by blasting in first with 123**

**HP vs HG proves that working together can have favorable results by apparating into 2nd with 103**

**Spidey, Marvel's crowned king, web swings next to HP vs. HG with 103**

**Louise blows the rest away by coming in to third with 80**

**The bet in HOTD goes unresolved for the time being by coming in 4****th**** with 37**

**The tale of SSB looks like its doomed to be told in flashbacks by placing 5****th**** with 38**

**And it seems Jorn managed to free Rebuke and Rebuff with a score 32 making them Last place**

**NOW before you rage I'm taking the top THREE (Or in this case 4 due to the tie…did you guys plan this?) stories and turning them in to fics. I WILL focus primarily on the first place story but the runner ups will be updated)**

**The rest of the stories will either be scrapped like SSB, May be co-authored with Jorn at a later point like HOTD or just updates if I ever have writer's block like Saints.**

**Happy Holidays, everyone!**

**~RebukeX7**


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